So its been a while. I’ve been super busy, super tired and super stressed. Currently, I have no idea if it’s all going to be worth it… but I have only been on placement for two weeks.
The last two weeks have absolutely flown. I’ve only been in school three days a week and I’m about to go in full time. I’ve realised that a PGCE is a very strange thing. A lot of people say it’s a lot of fun, that it’s super worth doing and that they’ve learnt so much, and I agree to all of those things.
Not everyone says that life goes on hold though. For the whole time I’ve been in Plymouth I have been on two nights out, to the pub casually once and to the library over 15 times. You spend a lot of time studying. I have three English workbooks to go through, I’ve had to do lots of maths SATS papers and for every subject we have to prove we know what we should know.
For me, I think the most difficult bit is transitioning from undergrad to postgrad. It’s essentially like going from having next to no responsibilities to having every responsibility under the sun. You can’t miss a lecture because they’re all important, you can’t just scrape through an assignment anymore, you can’t go on midweek nights out anymore. I honestly don’t think I am ready for this level of adulting.
The lack of a social life is a little difficult to get used to as well. I was seeing a girl while I was less busy at uni. Things got really busy and I stopped having time to see them and things fizzled out. Uni stresses that keeping a social life is key to making it through the year, but then they don’t give us time for a social life. That’s just down to a timetabling issue this year though and is usually more possible.
Being in school is a challenge too, transitioning from being an instructor where you are more casual and can get away with so much to being a teacher where you have to be formal and everything has to be done according to some policy is strange. I find it difficult being strict and it’s something I definitely need to do. I constantly worry about not knowing what I should know and that I think I’m going to say something wrong. But I guess that’s one way I’m proving to myself that doing this right means a lot to me.
On the upside although it’s a challenge, being in school is so fun. Watching the kids receive awards that are nominated by their classmates and seeing them validate their own self worth is amazing. Watching the kids get excited about finally figuring something out and seeing how proud they are of themselves is really nice. Being around adults that actually care about their kids achievements and that push their kids to achieve their best is so encouraging. Sure there are difficult days, and there are moments where you reevaluate your choices up till now. But I honestly believe the good days make the bad days bearable. I guess this is what doctors feel like when they tell someone that they don’t have cancer anymore.
I think the mistake I made was going straight from an undergraduate degree into a postgraduate degree without taking some time out to grow up.
I hope this doesn’t discourage anyone from becoming a teacher because I promise you that although the stress and the down moments come fast and thick, the good makes the bad so much easier to deal with. It is a lot of fun, you get to do lessons your way and you get to see people being proud of themselves, and ring so accepting of the world around them and it’s really refreshing. I can’t wait to qualify.