Well hello there! It recently occurred to me that I haven’t had anytime to just chill out and figure things out because of uni, preparing for a PGCE and work. Which is why I’m in an overfilled and way too hot bath. It seems I have forgotten how normal people have baths. If I move too much I’m going to flood my bathroom.
I need to figure out what I want, where I want to be and who I want to be around me. I’m getting to the point where I know I need to move out soon so I can just have my own space, and do my own thing. But to where? I mean, I love the idea of staying local, there are people here that I love to bits, and I won’t have the issue of moving to somewhere where I don’t know anyone. At the same time, exmouth is one of those places where if you don’t leave when you’re a young adult you will spend your life here. I think that’s why a lot of people I know are slowly moving away. I’ve said time and time again that I’d love to go back to Wales one day, and that’s still true, but I’d have the issue of not knowing anyone, unless I got a friend to move with me, or a girlfriend or something.
That’s the next thing I need to figure out. Do I actually want a girlfriend because I think I’m in the right mindset to have one, or do I want one because I’m the only single person in my friend group? I mean, my sisters getting married, my best friend is almost definitely going to be getting married to her boyfriend and a lot of people have started to have kids. I would love to have kids one day, I mean babies freak me out to no end, but after the baby stage, kids are pretty awesome.
I think I’m at the stage where I just want a girlfriend, I know that I’m gonna be super busy for the next year training to be a teacher, but I think having someone reminding me and encouraging me through it because they truely care and want me to do well would be a huge help. There is definitely one person in exmouth that I’d probably ask on a date, I think they’re great and they’re so talented and passionate about what they do and it’s so cute, she is also the kindest, which is important because a person will always be kind even when everything else fades.
The problem is that people I like either; aren’t interested, too busy or aren’t ready for a relationship. It happens every time I like someone genuinely lovely. This isn’t a dig at people by any means. I 100% understand that people have their own lives, their own problems and their own issues that might be stopping them doing things. I fully understand and empathise with them. I think I’ve just gotta figure out if now is the right time for a relationship or if I should just do me for a bit.
Well, I just move and I’ve flooded my bathroom. Patrick the duck (yes, I’ve named my rubber duck) is currently exploring the bathroom so I should probably clean this up before mum gets home!
Thank you for reading me sortin my life out for a bit, I really needed it!
Love you, bye!